Friday, August 29, 2008

The New GOP VP Nominee! Updated TWICE for Your Gossipy Needs!

Overheard today from people i like to consider smarter than the average bear:

ok, here are the notes from earlier:

She's DOA. People are scoffing around the politic-arati and you wonder...why?

Why? Because she's gone on record as saying that creationism should
be taught in schools.

Because her ads for governor featured Ted Stevens.

Because she's been involved in her own steadily growing scandal in
Alaska for the past three months, damning her in her own state--losing
the thousands of excited Republicans she had behind her originally.
(It involves using the governor's office to attack a cop--a
cop!--because he happened to once be married to her sister).

Because she's from a state with the fewest electoral votes IN THE
COUNTRY--three. Less than Mississippi, y'all. She's tied with Maine
and Montana. Three is the set minimum (hotly contested Penn. has 21).

Because Alaska has been rated as "trending Blue" towards Barack
anyway--in part because of the horrifying corruption of Stevens and
the growing disenchantment with Palin, who recently endorsed Barack's
energy plan as a sop to the huge environmental factions in Alaska.

Because 1 1/2 years ago, she was the PART TIME MAYOR OF A VILLAGE OF
6,000 PEOPLE.

Because Kay Bailey Hutchinson just said "I don't know much about her."

Because they're already calling her Geraldine Quayle.

Because she's only been to the Mainland a few times.

Because McCain's "lack of experience" attack on Obama is now off the table.

Because potatoe.

Because Trig, Willow, Bristol, and Piper are all shitty names. poor kids.

Because she won't be able to find Georgia on a map, let alone bust
Biden's chops over it.

HER ONE PLUS:

She ain't rich.
I say she's a hotter Harriet Miers. Her qualifications seem to be a uterus and a governership. I'm not saying she's terrible, but if you built your campaign around "he's not tested and ready to lead" then, she ain't the one.

as of 6pm today i have not seen any new press reports, but ...if they aren't giving her a hard time, It's Christmas in August. Don't get me wrong. she's not terrible. I'm not either...but if Obama picked me, he'd catch hell too.

UPDATE (the headlines):

VETTING PALIN: McCain Only Met Palin Once... Palin: What Exactly Does The VP Do Everyday?... McCain Spokeswoman: I Have No Idea What McCain's Relationship Is With Palin...

This is about to get "not-pretty."

UPDATE 2!:

Kreepy televangelist and McGod profiteer Dr. Dobson declares...

Dobson: 'I Would Pull that Lever'...


kreepy bastard.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

So, I too think that the "I would pull that lever" comment is creepy in a frighteningly overly sexual way (I mean, the implications are, essentially, "I would tap that"). But, I find it really amusing that the metaphor of choice is one of a lever. I get that the whole voting thing used to be done by lever to punch a hole in a card but when you start going into sexual metaphors a lever is generally not going to be representative of women. So, Dobson's metaphor might as well have been a rod or a stick. Is that some sort of Freudian slip? Did we learn something new about Mr. Focus-on-the-family?

Polly said...

don't make fun of my love! you meanie!

Anonymous said...

You love Dobson? Now you are creepy!

teahouse said...

You said it best, JP. I couldn't have put it into any better words to express my sentiments.